One Love educates young people about healthy and unhealthy relationships, empowering them to identify and avoid abuse and learn how to love better. There’s nothing like shared memories and nostalgia for cementing a bond. Somewhere away from the city and close to nature. Share your own interests with them as well. Keep Having Interactions That Sustain The Friendship. For example, if they expect you to listen to them talk about work troubles for hours at a time, you need to make it clear that you are not going to act as an unpaid therapist. Letting your relationship evolve. And we’ve all let that feeling take over, resigning a friend who moved across the country or even two towns over as a part of our past. Once you manage to save your friendship from untimely death, try these to keep the friendship strong. If your bestie is across the country or across the world, it might feel super impersonal to tell her that deep, dark thing you’ve been struggling with. Likewise, don’t automatically invite them into your life until you have had some time to think about your conversation. We are extremely lucky if there’s one person in the world we can call our best friend. Your friend may not have the kind of time they used to have or they may not be able to meet at the place you two used to meet. Even though being honest may mean having more difficult conversations with your friend, it will make for a stronger and better friendship. Or maybe you randomly send them that meme that made you laugh so hard you cried. Take interest in your friend’s life and major events. It gives us plenty of fresh shared memories while we also have tonnes of fun. Even though it can be hard to recognize when a friendship is weak in some areas, it is always possible to improve yourself and your relationship with a friend. The tips below will help you keep those ties strong by being honest, forgiving, and supportive. Who would have grey hair first? Be a good listener when she needs to talk. Being able to have trust and confidence in your friend is one of the most important requirements of a strong relationship because true friendship means you are able to count on one another. See if they send you a text voluntarily or if they call you next. The ill feelings too, do not last very long. I’ve always held the belief that forgiving someone is a virtue. Tasha Howe, head of the psychology department at Humboldt State University in Arcata, California, and author of the textbook Marriages and Families in the 21st Century says: If they add something to your life, if they make you grow as a person, then it’s worth continuing. There’s absolutely nothing wrong in ending a friendship that is no longer mutual. Ugh, not cool. Unless you make an effort to ‘talk’ to a friend, Facebook likes and comments don’t count. Our bonds with our friends are some of the most important connections we will make in our entire life and it goes without saying that a healthy friendship can’t grow without proper care and attention. And then switch location for the next meeting. Keeping a friendship strong is not too difficult if you are invested in the relationship. It’s not over the top, but enough to make your friend go ‘Awwww!’. Which is a gift really, when you have lived a lifetime and your kids have moved on. Especially if what caused the rift is a serious thing. … It’s a heavy burden to carry for a lifetime. By staying true to yourself your self-respect and self-worth will remain strong and you will have the confidence you need in order to create a lasting friendship. Every one needs to have at least one great friend they can trust and rely on. If you know your friend is about to go on a surgery, ask them if they need help. When you have been through a lot together like good friends always do, it’s curious how you’d both be when really, really old. So don’t badger them with texts and calls and e-mails when you don’t hear from them. © 2020 Condé Nast. Be your own best friend firstLearn how to respect yourself. 3. These have no place in any form of relationship, and friendships are no different. These thoughtful gestures can be as small as sending them a picture of something that reminded you of a time the two of you spent together, or as big as putting together a care package if you know your friend could use some extra support. This means that long distance friendships are a constant challenge, as you’re away from any group of friends for several months out of the year. Challenges such as these however, do signal that one of them will have to intervene and figure out how to save the friendship. Or maybe instead of telling them about that makeup look that went horribly wrong, you send them an selfie of its aftermath. An example of having a trustworthy friend is being able to talk to them about a personal issue you are facing, knowing that what is said will stay between the two of you and that they will not judge you or the circumstance. The unfamiliarity of the place will keep you guys together. But you do need to approach it systematically and with humility. Nationwide News Pty Limited Copyright © 2020. talking bad behind a friend’s back. Have old photo albums stacked in your apartment in your new city of you and your friends from childhood? If you are one of the lucky ones to have a best friend, you need to know how to save a friendship and keep it strong forever. Do not judge your friend. Ego, pride, arrogance, self-righteousness. Mainly because I think it’s really sweet to give a long lost friend a gift. Develop a genuine concern for your friend’s well-being. You know what they say, actions speak louder than words. You might not be able to get in that in-person game of Scrabble, but Words with Friends is here to make sure that you continue torturing your group with your extensive vocabulary. A good friendship doesn’t happen by accident. If it’s been a while since you last saw your friend, make the first move by reaching out and asking whether they’d like to meet up. Realise that nobody's perfect. In successful friendships, it is always important to be independent of your friend and allow your friend to have their personal space as well. New York, New Jersey & Connecticut Tri-State. Especially if efforts aren’t taken to maintain it. Have you ever had a friend that brought out the worst in you? In most situations, it is very difficult for two people to move forward without someone acknowledging that a mistake has been made. Use our powerful films and discussion guides to transform relationships in your community. How to Create Boundaries This Holiday Season – A People Pleaser’s Guide, My Go-To Formula for a Thanksgiving Menu that Makes Everyone Happy, Britt Maren Shows Us the Secret to Her Mini Pumpkin Tarts, 20 Healthy Soup Recipes to Balance Holiday Indulgences, How to Host Thanksgiving Without the Stress, Beyond the Filter: NBC News Now Reporter, Simone Boyce’s Life and Career Is Anything But Conventional, © 2020 Camille Styles Inc, All rights reserved, PHOTO: Kristen Kilpatrick, Contax645, Film Photography, Austin Texas, Outdoor Voices, Outdoor Voices Austin, Ty Haney Outdoor Voices, Ty Haney, Ty Haney home, Ty Haney Style, Getting Dressed with Ty Haney, Founder of Outdoor Voices, Camille Styles, Camille Styles blog, Camille Styles Austin. A call every few weeks, text messages every now and then can strengthen a friendship. Be Honest And I don’t mean the friend we see in our mums, dads, siblings or spouse either. And if it was something your friend did, you’ll get to hear their side of the story if you haven’t already. I wish you all the best! Distance between friends occur when one of both get too busy, drift, move to a different location or change priorities. You are perhaps the "best version" of yourself when you're with your friend. For example try saying, “When you don’t do the dishes like we agreed, I feel like you’re disrespecting me because then, I have to do them and forgo other tasks I had planned.”. Take your friend on a tour with you through the polaroids you take. But lately, I have been reading articles that say it’s okay not to forgive others for certain behaviors. Never try to manipulate a friend by pointing out how much you’ve done for them. 12. You can keep texting them or calling them once in a while, but they might need more time. Even after pouring both your hearts out, you might still need some time and space to process what you’ve talked about. And other days that commemorate something related to your friend. If your friend is a teacher, you can send them flowers on teacher’s day. Ask yourself the following questions about your friendships and hopefully, you have the same answers as I do. And to forgive if apologized to. YES, Does this person ever try to make you feel bad about yourself? On one hand, you’re excited for their new life chapter – be it growing their family, making career moves, or following their dreams – but the feeling of loss can be unshakeable. How would you view cosmetic surgery when everything begins to drag on the floor? If you are authentic and are willing to open yourself up to others, you will find that there are many people who are looking for a good friend. Realise that even the best of friends can't be together 24/7Develop other interests and don't be jealous when your friend has other hobbies or other friends. borrowing money from a friend and not returning it. How do you keep the flames of friendship burning when you’re far away? If you set expectations for your best friends that are too high, it will only leave you disappointed if these expectations are not met. Although good friends can inspire you, you want to avoid obsessive comparisons that might bring you down or … How does one stay connected? So try not to keep … YESDoes this person seem to understand you? Here are some tips to help keep your friendships long and strong, regardless of distance. Don't even leak it out to someone you think you can trust. Respect each other's opinionsYour friends are allowed to have a different opinion to you, which is what makes us all individuals. It’s easy to promise that you’ll hang out “soon,” then realize that suddenly three months have gone by since you last saw your friend. Blaming others will only invalidate your apology and infuriate your friend further. Time and space can heal things quite a bit but you can only know after you’ve given the friendship both. Just like a romantic relationship, it needs love and care to thrive. Which old folks home you should register for and if you should make advance booking since you really can’t trust your kids these days. Well, it could be that you have a one-sided friendship on your hands. 6. Any relationship will die without regular communication. Teen Vogue may earn a portion of sales from products that are purchased through our site as part of our Affiliate Partnerships with retailers. Would you schedule the surgeries at the same clinic on the same day? If enough time has passed (which I suspect it would have since you’re ready to save the relationship), talking about what happened should not be too difficult for either of you. Your email address will not be published. Pick a day and time that usually always works for both (or all) of you. It will give you something new to talk about, which will make for more interesting conversations. If you know your friend doesn’t like to study, make one or two of those regularly-scheduled Skype sessions a cyber study group. Communication is really importantYour friend can't read your mind. I’d want to go to Ross, I even did a few times, but it was so lame without her. However the conversation turns out to be, try to remain calm and talk without getting too emotional. This is my number one tip for when it comes to letting a relationship evolve and grow. Learn more about One Love’s work and how you can get involved. Distance really does make the heart grow fonder. Be prepared to apologize again. Distance really does make the heart grow fonder.