Thanks to some handy advice, I learned that Halo Top is at its best when left out to thaw a bit. More strangers, friends of friends, random professional acquaintances, and assorted baristas knew about my Halo Top diet than the people I told about the Master Cleanse and Cabbage Soup Diet combined. A single pint boasts a mere 240–320 calories depending on the flavor, with anywhere from 20-24 grams of protein. It may have taken me two years to recover from the debacle that was the Cabbage Soup Diet, but I only came back stronger, more stubborn, and single-mindedly dedicated to destroying my body by any means necessary. This entire saga is my formal apology to him. While not necessarily a fad diet, I was sold. In fact, I wouldn’t be able to hit that mark again before the diet ended. Of course, it’s gained a cult-like following of people eating nothing but Halo Top, even including Yahoo editors, who attempted a three-day Halo Top diet … Nur 280-374 Kalorien pro Becher. The Best 'Bachelorette' Recap You’ll Ever Read: Is Dale… Okay? I would like to say that Day Two was rock bottom when in fact, each new day that I woke up and committed to eating nothing but ice cream was a new level of rock bottom that I had never thought myself possible of accessing.

On the first day of this venture, I sat in a office-wide meeting, smack dab in the middle of the eye line of a man who had been asked to come in and talk about his illustrious career and instead got to sit and make eye contact for 30 full minutes with a girl who was shamelessly elbow deep in a pint of ice cream at 9am in the morning. Look at how quirky I am! In the Halo Top diet, I had finally met my match. Total protein consumed: 74 grams. However, while I may have lamented this diet and spent many long afternoons dreaming of quesadillas, I couldn’t deny that the Halo Top tasted good. The three already published articles about this very experience probably also could have served as an indicator, but whatever. I don’t know if it was the great Dairy Attack of the day before or if I had just finally hit my breaking point, but I couldn’t seem to force myself to my regular 3.5 pints. After a few days, the kind souls at Halo Top got back to me, undoubtedly psyched that another writer with zero regard for their health wanted to give them a platform to discuss their product. It took a minute for the implication to set in that my beloved dairy had somehow betrayed me but once it did, everything changed. I knew that it was more sweets than I was accustomed to. With no medical education or any real reasoning behind it, I figured I could probably manage this routine for a week before I died, either from lack of nutrients or by my own hand. I learned a lot on this first day,  and while some of the discoveries were helpful, not all of them were things I really wanted to know about either life or myself.

These are her stories. I also found out it only takes me 30 minutes to eat an entire pint of ice cream. I don’t have time for things like nature to take its course, so I microwaved all my pints for 20 seconds before eating them. Yahoo is part of Verizon Media. Total protein consumed: 60 grams. No amount of attempted explanations will make anyone feel better about that.